Not Just A Blonde

We are "Not Just" who we seem to be on this Earthly plane, but so much more. We are ALL children of a loving God who is calling us home to Love. This blog is dedicated to those of us on that journey together…

“‘Everything is permissible for me’—but not everything is beneficial. ‘Everything is permissible for me’—but I will not be mastered by anything.”

1 Corinthians 6:12 (NIV)

In other words: Just because you CAN do something doesn’t mean you SHOULD do something! Beware of addictions and dangerous choices that might hurt you… think before you do anything! Pause and ask yourself: Is what I am about to do BENEFICIAL or detrimental to me? The right choice is often the one that embraces the most love.


So what, you messed up? You say you feel like a filthy piece of garbage at the bottom of a dumpster in the back alley behind a sleazy bar? You feel like a loser? You feel like trash? Before you throw away the rest of your life… before you give up on your future… before you silence any of your dreams… listen to me: Stop.

Your shame will only imprison you longer. You are much more than any mistake. God can use you in ways that you would never be able to be used before you wandered off the more direct path towards Him. Yes, He can even transform your mistakes into something good if you let Him! 

 To be tempted and to taste darkness is to be human. Everyone sins. Everyone stumbles. Everyone sucks at one time or another. That’s just a fact. Make no mistake… no matter how far off track you have been, no matter how dark the trail, once you decide you’ve had enough all you gotta do is call out to God to help you find your way. Once you fix your eyes on Him you will immediately find yourself on a path that will lead you back towards Love; there you will find your purpose and your peace.


It is EASY to cut someone down, to shame them and judge them…

It takes EFFORT to encourage someone, forgive someone and to LOVE someone.

Jesus never said following Him would be easy, but He was pretty clear in instructing us to LOVE one another.


There is something quite freeing when we let go of the need to always be liked. Often if we are not liked it has more to do with the other person than anything we have done.

Are we always going to act perfect and never do anything that upsets another? Absolutely not! But, everyone is human and has made mistakes… if others are not willing to share with us how we’ve offended them, well, we are not mind-readers nor saints… therefore we cannot be ruled by others’ unspoken fears or assumptions.

Each of us are different with different preferences, personalities and temperaments. We don’t have to like everybody and certainly everybody does not have to like us. We do however need to learn to like ourselves… we need to appreciate our strengths and forgive ourselves for our weaknesses. We were created by a loving God with these special qualities for a reason. There is one thing I know for sure: to God we are each both likable and lovable… and who are we to argue with that? 😉

“It’s not your job to like me. It’s mine.”
~ Byron Katie

“It is better to be hated for what you are than loved for what you are not.”
~ André Gide

We often hide our authentic selves as we fear judgement and rejection. The world describes what is acceptable, lovable and beautiful and we scramble to hide those parts of us that fall outside of these fickle demands.

We crave the unconditional love and affirmation of our true selves, yet this can never be experienced if we never show our realness and open ourselves up to be fully known!

No one wants to be hated, yet if we are ever hated at least we have been authentically recognized! Unless we risk rejection we will never know the joy of expressing the uniqueness and beauty of our true selves. Unless we risk hate, we may never know what it feels like to be truly loved.


Sometimes I put on a smile for the world, when my insides are crying. I try to go through the motions of fitting in when I really feel like an alien in a foreign land. Disconnected and dishonest… I feel miserable! I feel like an “imitation Ann”… close to the real deal… just not quite “right”, ya know? So why do I continue to smile, smile, smile… when in reality I just want to cry?!

I guess it’s because I try to “Fake it til I make it”! Who wants to be around sadness, awkwardness and negativity anyways? Especially when I know others struggle with so much more… so I plaster on a smile and carry on.

Sometimes I can smile and respond “I’m good, and you?” and feel the brief relief of denial, but usually over time I end up feeling like a phony… and a bit guilty over deceiving so many unsuspecting folks!

But that is what we do, isn’t it? After all, it is often seen as socially inappropriate to bear our souls. Not everyone is ready or capable of hearing the truth about what is really going on behind our masks. Sometimes, let’s be honest, some folks just don’t even care.

And yet, it is such a relief when I can be honest and share the realness of my life and my troubles! How affirming it is to share with those who truly care and are non-judgmental about the pain I am carrying. Being authentic and honest about how I’m feeling relieves a burden of my soul and truly lightens my load and heals my heart!

We are called to be authentic and honest. Yes, sometimes there is such a thing as TMI (“too much information” haha!) and we must always respect the limitations and fears of those with whom we are sharing our stories and our hearts… yet I believe, yes, truly believe we are called to be bravely open and honest with our struggles and our triumphs of the spirit.

Psychotherapy, friendships, marriages, support groups, and small groups at church are all examples of key places we can share the truth of our journey and ourselves. I believe these meetings and relationships are inspired by the Divine who never intended we set out on this journey alone… but are meant to be together in truth!

We should let go of any attachment to the approval from others. We should let go of the worry of feeling embarrassed, ridiculed or ashamed. Instead we might consider the pain of living a lie… the burden of a journey with the cloak of fear hiding out true thoughts and souls.

Life is not meant to be “acted” but to be lived… and we are called to live authentically! Be brave! Be fierce!

We shall live as openly and as be as REAL as we can with the rewards of connection, of healing and of true peace to follow.

Sometimes we must “fake it til we make it”, we just shouldn’t fake it for too long. 😉 More often we need to open ourselves up to each other and to love.

I am feeling much relief these days as I have received the gift of an open ear and an open heart… a true gift of life and love that has transformed me. I am grateful to all who accept me without my mask and who by example inspire me to leave it off more and more. Thank you to all who encourage me as I aspire to embrace my truth and my authenticity!

May we all remember the potential sadness that may linger behind another’s smile. May we each feel inspired to share our truth and our pain in order to be transformed and so we all may feel the relief of setting down our masks.



Most of life’s unhappiness occurs when we forget who we really are.

We aren’t our bodies, our clothes, our jobs, nor our circumstances. We are spirits… we are children of a Loving Eternal God!

When we make choices that are not in-line with our true identity and purpose we will often find ourselves lost, alone and confused.

Once we remember who we really are and live in harmony with God’s Love we will find our happiness and our peace.


When we open the door to darkness we welcome this darkness into our lives and into the lives of those closest to us. Once this door is opened there is a force of evil that will beckons us to step into it’s shadows! The darkness will entices us with it’s lies and tempt us with elaborate yet empty promises.

The darkness wishes to blind us to our purpose! It desires to cloak our souls and distract us from all Light. Consumed by the darkness we try to find our way yet we stumble and fall again and again, each time suffering injuries greater than the last… confused by how we got here and blinded as to where to go!

If we pause for a moment in our darkest hour, pray to see the Light and cry out for help on where to go there is no doubt our prayers will be answered. The Light of love will shine in on us once again and lead us home.

After spending time in darkness our eyes may become sensitive to light! We must not confuse this with more suffering! We often must walk through the darkness towards the light that shines brightly… and must not be afraid!

“Fear not”… some of the most loving words to have been said. We each have nothing to fear if we focus on the light. Darkness is made of fear but light is made of Love. It takes only a little bit of Love to dispel a whole lot of darkness.

If caught up in darkness, close your eyes and breathe a prayer… send out a call to Light, to Love, to God and you will be expelled from the shadows and welcomed with utter joy back into the Light… back to your path of purpose… and into the arms of Love!

John 1:5 (NIV) ~ The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.

Isaiah 41:10 (NIV) ~ So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Joshua 1:9 (NLT) ~ This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.

Psalm 34:4 (NLT) ~ I prayed to the Lord, and he answered me. He freed me from all my fears.

John 8:12 (NIV) ~ When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.”

Some days are Thinking Days. These are the days when introspection is preferred over conversation. These are days when we are neither especially happy nor unhappy. Thoughts are collected, inspected and then released.

Thinking Days find smiles slight and infrequent, yet deep sighs are plentiful. These days are often times when we can calm our minds and heal our souls.

Thinking Days are not days to fear but to cherish. A day such as this is the time we retreat inside our minds to connect with the Spirit inside.



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